#CBR11 Book 4: "Pipe Dreams" by Sarina Bowen

Page count: 336 pages
Audio book length: 9 hrs 34 mins
Rating: 2 stars

Lauren Williams used to love hockey, but after Brooklyn Bruisers goalie Mike Beacon suddenly dumped her without warning, she stays far away from the game, and is very grateful that her boss, Nate Kattenberger, has her running his office in Manhattan, so she can focus on moving on and building a life for herself on her own. She's about to graduate from college, with a lot of bright career prospects in her future and she's planning on having a baby, by herself. She's none too happy when Nate's former assistant, Becca, who now helps manage the team gets a concussion, so Lauren has to help cover for her and brings her up close to the hockey team on a daily basis again.

Mike Beacon got married to his high school sweetheart after he knocked her up, and while he never regretted the daughter he got, his wife never really wanted to be married to a top athlete, and their marriage suffered. When they finally separated, he made his move on Lauren, who he'd dreamed about for years, but kept things professional with until it was clear his marriage was a thing of the past. Mike and Lauren spent a deliriously happy year together, but just as Mike's divorce was about to come through, he discovered that his soon to be ex-wife had terminal cancer, and the situation was unbearable for his little girl. Making the difficult choice to move back in with his wife and daughter, he didn't really tell Lauren the severity of the situation (he kept claiming to have a good reason for this - I never really got what the heck he was thinking).

Now, two years later, Mike is raising a thirteen-year-old and regretting screwing things up with Lauren. Since she appears to still be single, he decides to try to win her back, but he has his work cut out for him, both with Lauren, and his daughter, who because of malicious gossip from other players' wives believes Lauren to be some evil home wrecker.

I hadn't read any Sarina Bowen for a long time when I picked up Brooklynaire, which turned out to be a fun, if a bit flawed, read. Since I still had about a week left on my Audible romance deal, I decided to check out the previous book in the series, with a plot that clearly runs at least partially concurrently with the sequel. I was surprised at how much overlap there actually was, and if I'd read these in order, I probably would have rated Brooklynaire lower, since there were whole scenes that were more or less repeated entirely. I read them in the right order, though, as there is no way I would have wanted to pick up the sequel if I'd read this one first.

This was, to be honest, quite a slog. While I liked Lauren as a supporting character in Brooklynaire and she was a perfectly agreeable romance heroine in her own right, I didn't really care for Mike at all, nor his plot moppet adolescent with her temper tantrums and jealousy fits, even though her male nanny/live in violin teacher was pretty cool. His reasons for going back to his wife were noble enough, but the way he handled things with Lauren was abysmal, and he certainly didn't deserve to have her back in any way. I didn't care for the way he pretty much nagged his way back into her good graces, and her heart. If you see nothing romantic or attractive about the book's hero, the romance isn't really going to work. That was the case here.

MINOR SPOILER! Also, I never thought that I'd find something worse than the still frequently occurring "pregnancy epilogue". This book, however, ends with an actual, extended description of childbirth, which is no one's idea of a good time. That was pretty much the final nail in the coffin for me, and I think Sarina Bowen is on extended hiatus for me again.

Judging a book by its cover: You can tell that it's a book about hockey because the burly, muscular dude on the cover is holding a hockey stick. Of course, the hero of this book is a goalie, so should really be wearing a lot more padding. In general, this guy is wearing way too little for a hockey player, even in a friendly team practise, I would think going on the ice wearing nothing but some dark trousers would be inviting all sorts of injuries. But how could we tell it was a romance if there wasn't man titty on the cover?

Crossposted on Cannonball Read.

#CBR11 Book 1: "Brooklynaire" by Sarina Bowen

Page count: 452 pages
Audio book length: 9 hrs 39 mins
Rating: 3.5 stars

Rebecca "Becca" Rowley has worked for tech billionaire Nate Kattenberger for more than seven years. She managed his office while he and a few friends were still an optimistic start up. For the last few years, she's gone from being his personal assistant to managing the hockey team he bought, the Brooklyn Bruisers. Foolishly walking onto the ice to personally deliver a message, Rebecca falls and gets a concussion. Several weeks later, she's still not well and fretting terribly about her inability to get back to work. Not helping her recovery, which requires that she rest a lot and stay in a peaceful environment, is the fact that Rebecca shares an apartment with her younger sister, her infant nephew and the baby's father. Not exactly restful surroundings.

As the weeks progress and Becca doesn't recover, Nate not only insists she see a specialist, but he whisks her away to his six-bedroom mansion, so she can relax properly and be taken care of by his household staff (his housekeeper is amazing!). Becca worries that she's taking advantage of their long friendship, being the only person in Nate's organisation who's still unaware of his true feelings for her. Nate's massive crush on Becca has apparently been obvious not just to his current personal assistant, Lauren, but most of the hockey team, as well as several of their mutual friends. When she's injured and has a difficult recovery, his protective feelings towards her pretty much drive him crazy.

I'm not spoiling anything when I say that Becca and Nate eventually hook up and share a very steamy night together. However, while Becca strictly speaking works for the hockey team, Nate, as the owner of the team is still her boss, so it's a difficult situation, and the power dynamics are certainly unfortunate. Becca has a bunch of self esteem issues and can't really believe that someone as rich, brilliant, handsome and important as Nate would really want someone like her. She also doesn't want to be accused of trying to further her career by sleeping with her boss. Nate, on the other hand, is only too aware of how inappropriate sleeping with your former executive assistant is. He moved Becca to help manage the Brooklyn Bruisers specifically so he wouldn't have to share an office with her daily and obviously lust after his employee.

I saw this book on a number of "Best of 2018" romance lists at the end of last year. I also had a chance to try out the Audible Romance add-on for free for a month, and this was one of the books offered. While I don't see myself actually wanting to pay money monthly for the extra Audible subscription (with very few exceptions, pretty much all the books of the romance authors I really like, and would have wanted included in such a deal, aren't actually available, and have to be purchased separately), it was a fun enough book. There were a lot of good things about it. The "friends to lovers" trope was executed well enough. I liked a lot of the supporting cast, especially Nate's housekeeper. His robo butler/alternative to Alexa/Siri was also pretty cool. There was good banter and nice chemistry between the protagonists.

However, there were also things that could have been a lot better. The book occasionally flashes back to seven years ago, showing us the start of the friendship between Nate and Becca. When Rebecca is hired by Nate, as the office manager of his little start-up, his business partner, who deals with the finances asks if Becca will be given stock options as part of her salary. The answer is "not for clerical staff". Yet it becomes clear from the book's present day sections that Becca became pretty integral for the smooth day to day running of the company that eventually went huge and netted Nate his eventual billions. That she became a lot more than just his "assistant". So it seems both strange and incredibly unfair that Becca was never given even a few shares in his hugely successful venture, and as a result, was cheated out of a very comfortable life.

At the start of the book, Becca is fretting about a possible rent increase on her apartment (she doesn't get one because SPOILER - of course the building she lives in is owned by one of Nate's many holding companies) and she certainly worries about her medical expenses when seeing specialists and having very necessary physical therapy isn't covered by her insurance. This would be needless worries if she owned just a few shares in Nate's tech empire. I frankly wasn't super happy with the rather heavy-handed way Nate dealt with her medical bills either. While he was acting from a place of worry and wanting to take care of Becca, he pretty much just went over her head and put her in an embarrassing position.

I haven't read any Sarina Bowen in a long time. This was a fun enough book, but if it's a top ten romance of 2018, it's yet another sign that 2018 just wasn't a very good year for romance, historical or contemporary. Not sure if the book made me want to read more of the Brooklyn Bruisers series or not. There is one more book in the series available in the Audible romance package, about Nate's other assistant, Lauren, which I may check out before my free month runs out - but I haven't quite decided yet.

Judging a book by its cover: Considering the rest of the covers in this series features the rather laughable concept of very brawny shirtless dudes (with parts of their heads cropped off, cause you don't want to see their actual faces) with some random hockey gear visible, this one is even more hilarious. Since Nate is a geeky tech billionaire and merely the owner of the hockey team, they can't really go with sports paraphernalia, but we can't get away from our shirtless dude. So instead we get a hipster dude doing his best blue steel (looking half asleep behind his glasses) having inexplicably lost his shirt (but not his suit jacket or tie) somewhere along the way. Oh, and the Brooklyn Bridge in the background, just in case you were unsure of where the book is set. Stay classy, romance covers.

Crossposted on Cannonball Read.

#CBR8 Book 51: "Him" by Sarina Bowen and Elle Kennedy

Page count: 274 pages
Rating: 4.5 pages

Summary from Goodreads:

They don't play for the same team? Or do they?

Jamie Canning has never been able to figure out how he lost his closest friend. Four years ago, his tattooed, wise-cracking, rule-breaking roommate cut him off without an explanation. So what if things got a little weird on the last night of hockey camp the summer they were eighteen? It was just a little drunken foolishness. Nobody died. 

Ryan Wesley's biggest regret is coaxing his very straight friend into a bet that pushed the boundaries of their relationship. Now, with their college teams set to face off at the national championship, he'll finally get a chance to apologize. But all it takes is one look at his longtime crush, and the ache is stronger than ever.

Jamie has waited a long time for answers, but walks away with only more questions - can one night of sex ruin a friendship? If not, how about six more weeks of it? When Wesley turns up to coach alongside Jamie for one more hot summer at camp, Jamie has a few things to discover about his old friend...and a big one to learn about himself. 

Warning: contains sexual situations, skinnydipping, shenanigans in an SUV and proof that coming out to your family on social media is a dicey proposition. 

While Wes is now sort of "don't ask, don't tell" out to his hockey teammates and coaches at college, he was only really coming to terms with his sexuality when he was eighteen and crushing hard on his best friend at hockey camp. Absolutely desperate for an excuse to touch him, he made a drunken bet and subsequently freaked out after he and his best friend fooled around one very memorable time. Feeling horribly guilty, Wes cut off all contact with his friend and they haven't spoken for four years. Now their teams are likely to face off in the national championships, and Wes feels he should probably make some sort of gesture of reconciliation.

Raised in a large and loving family in California, Jamie really isn't too bothered about the drunken experimentation at hockey camp, but he's hurt and upset that Wes pretty much burned all the bridges of their friendship and never spoke to him after that one night. He's surprised to discover that Wes has resurrected their old tradition of sending each other gag gifts, and suddenly seems willing to patch up their broken friendship as well. He's even more surprised when Wes shows up at camp to coach for the summer, even though he should be getting ready for his big break in Toronto.

Having seen and spoken to Jamie again, Wes can't get him out of his mind, and wants to spend as much time with him as possible, even if he can never admit his true feelings. He's shocked to realise that Jamie wasn't horribly traumatised by their one drunken night together and even more surprised to realise that he may even be willing to repeat the experience. After Jamie does some soul-searching and concludes that he very much seems to be attracted to either gender, the two friends can barely keep off each other, hooking up every chance they get.

While Wes has been more or less openly out in college, he doesn't want to attract press attention during the first year of his new and promising hockey career. He's planning on staying strictly celibate and a relationship is the last thing he's looking for. Jamie's due in Detroit at the end of the summer, but doesn't even know if he wants a career in hockey. He only ever started playing to stand out from the other men in the family who were all into football and now that he's done with college, he's not sure his head is really in the game, if it doesn't involve coaching. There doesn't seem to be much of a future for the two of them, even though they keep growing closer as the weeks pass by.

I have yet to read anything else by Elle Kennedy, although I've heard good things about her Off-Campus series. I very much enjoyed all of the books in Sarina Bowen's The Ivy Years, though, including her M/M romance The Understatement of the Year. That book involved a lot more angst, though, with Graham's initial denial and reluctance to accept his feelings and sexual identity being both frustrating and a bit exhausting.

What I loved about this book is that there isn't really a lot of wrestling with insecurities. Jamie has grown up in California, perfectly comfortable with homosexuality and doesn't feel violated or traumatised by the drunken night he and Wes spent together at eighteen. By the time Jamie and Wes meet again, Wes has accepted that he's gay and is out to his parents (who chose to mainly ignore his confession) and most of his friends. He tells the head coach at the hockey camp and Jamie shortly after arriving there and is comfortable in himself, but has never had a steady boyfriend, as he still secretly pines for the one man he can't have, Jamie.

After an evening out, seeing Wes flirting with someone else, Jamie gets uncharacteristically jealous and initiates a passionate kiss. Wes assumes he's just drunk and confused, and tries to brush him off, not wanting him to do something he'll regret. Jamie's really rather persistent though, and quite skillfully seduces his infatuated bestie. Despite Wes' fears, Jamie seems to have no regrets come morning. Some alone time with his computer and various kinds of porn makes him conclude he's most likely bi and he's more than happy to keep hooking up with Wes for as long as they're at camp.

As is par the course for any romance, the course of true love never does run entirely smooth. Where would be the fun in that? As ecstatic as Wes is about spending quality hockey time with his best friend by day and passionately hooking up by night, he's pretty sure that once Jamie goes off to Detroit, he'll find himself some nice girl to settle down with, and there's that whole going temporarily back in the closet for himself, so as to not attract undue attention during his first year as a pro.

While the book starts out a bit slow, the story really picks up once the story moves to the hockey camp where Jamie and Wes first met many years ago and Jamie now coaches every summer. Both protagonists are funny and likable in their separate ways and the supporting cast around them felt nicely developed too. The love scenes are pretty much all scorching, from their very first kiss (in the rain, because of course it is). I haven't read a lot of M/M romance, but I have never had a problem in seeing the appeal. One hot dude is good, two hot dudes, being hot for each other - so much better.

I'm now a bit torn about getting the sequel, Us, that came out earlier this year. On the one hand, I'd get more Jamie and Wes and seeing how their life together is panning out (plus probably a lot more hot sex). On the other hand, I'm worried there's going to be a lot more complications introduced before they get their eventual HEA after all, and I'm not sure I want that. As long as I have only read this one, they're perfectly gooey and happy together. I really do need to get round to reading the Off-Campus books now, though.

Judging a book by its cover: Some very ripped abs sadly obscured by the unnecessarily large title (would it have hurt the cover designers to let me have a bit more eight-pack to ogle?). You're clearly meant to objectify the very fit model too, otherwise there is no excuse for the t-shirt he's wearing being half pulled off like that. He doesn't even have a face. See, it's totally ok to leer at this handsome athlete - he's completely anonymous. Just so you know what manner of sportsball is being played in the book, the cover designers have also kindly included a hockey stick as well. Because readers are really seeking out these books because of the sports contents, that's right.

Crossposted on Cannonball Read.

#CBR8 Book 10: "The Shameless Hour" by Sarina Bowen

Page count: 334 pages
Rating: 4 stars

Bella, the student manager of the Harkness varsity hockey team, loves sex and isn't afraid to say so. She knows that a lot of guys and especially their girlfriends frequently say uncomplimentary things about her behind her back because of her reputation, but Bella isn't ashamed of enjoying sex in all its many forms. Hence when her hot downstairs neighbour ends up on her doorstep one evening with a bottle of wine, dejected because he broke up with his girlfriend on his birthday, she cheers him up the best way she knows how, and can't quite understand why he gets so flustered and awkward the next day.

What Bella doesn't know is that Rafe was a virgin, and had been planning on losing said virginity the night before with his long-term girlfriend Alison. Discovering that she had cheated on him wasn't exactly the birthday present he was looking for and getting drunk and seduced by the gorgeous girl upstairs was certainly never part of his plans. Rafe doesn't regret what happened, but isn't interested in no-strings hook-ups every so often. His mother got pregnant with him when she was very young and Rafe has been raised in a loving, but very Catholic environment, so the idea of casual sex just doesn't appeal to him. He only wants to sleep with someone he's in a committed relationship with. Bella is most certainly not the long-term relationship type, and last thing Rafe wants is to pressure her into anything she's not ready for. He just doesn't feel comfortable telling her why he's having a hard time facing her after their night of *insert funky bass line here*

Then Bella discovers she has chlamydia and goes to inform the guy she knows she caught it from. She wakes up the next morning, naked, with her body covered in insults in permanent marker. She knows can tell that she wasn't sexually assaulted in any way, but photos of her naked body are posted on several websites and while Bella was ok with the occasional snide remark about her reputation, having been publicly humiliated in this way is something else entirely. She (understandably) has a minor breakdown, refusing to leave her room or see anyone.

She isolates herself enough that she loses her job as team manager and eventually, deeply concerned, Rafe convinces her next door neighbour to let him into her room through their shared bathroom. He insists on helping her, as much as he's able to, bringing her food, coaxing her out to go running, helping her with lecture notes, anything to make sure she actually snaps out of herself a bit. Bella doesn't want anyone's help and she's decided that she's done with men for good. Her previously iron-clad confidence has taken a heck of a blow, and Rafe hates to see her broken by malicious assholes. Allying himself with Bella's reclusive (and previously pretty judgemental next-door neighbour), he does his best to help Bella get her mojo back. Lianne, the star of a series of sorcery movies (think Emma Watson), turns out to have hacking as a hobby and offers to help Bella bring the frat boys who humiliated her down, so they can't subject anyone else to their illegal tricks.

Progressive and feminist as a lot of romance novels are, there is often a really unfortunate tendency to slut-shame and villainize sexually experienced women, while men get away scot free. Smart Bitches, Trashy Books had some posts about it as recently as January, both one complaining about the prevalence of the trope even in even fairly recent books, and one recommending sex positive romances, where Sarina Bowen featured very prominently, which is well deserved. Bella isn't doing anything that most romance heroes, contemporary or historical, are prone to do, yet she's judged by a completely different standard. She's a cheerful, outgoing and very bubbly supporting character in The Understatement of the Year, who gets hurt when the guy she considers one of her best friends, crushes on and has hooked up with on and off turns out to have been using her mainly to stay in the closet. Not that she lets that get her down for long. It's why the reader will feel extra for her when she's subjected to such a horrible fraternity stunt, which breaks her previously so strong and independent spirit.

That Bella also has a pretty comprehensively messed up family situation, with parents, a sister and a creepy brother-in-law who are more than happy to assume the worst about her and judge her for her promiscuous ways. The incident seems to make Bella believe what all the malicious people around her have been implying, and neither Rafe nor her friends on the hockey team (although she refuses to tell them the truth) can stand to see her broken.

One of the things I really like in these books are the supportive friendships that both the male and the female characters have. It doesn't feel like the protagonists exist in this bubble of only them, with the occasional token college friend popping up to add colour and verisimilitude. Both the female and male friendships feel real, with the kind of teasing but also support that is so important. While Bella and her reclusive next door neighbour start out fairly antagonistic towards one another, they grow a lot closer after Bella pretty much holes up in her room, seeing no one but Rafe or Lianne voluntarily.

I should probably say something about our hero, too, shouldn't I? Rafe is part of a large and boisterous Dominican family, whose father hasn't really been around much. He's grown up helping out in their restaurant and dreams of helping his mother and uncles improve and expand their business. His dialogue is peppered with Hispanic phrases, but since I don't know any Spanish, I can't say whether they are accurate or not. Like Andy in Blonde Date, Rafe is almost Marty Stu-adjacent in just how perfect he is. While he may have been raised in a Catholic environment that puts a very high value on purity, there doesn't seem to be so much as a judgemental bone in his body with regards to Bella's lifestyle choices. This is certainly refreshing, but I'm not sure if it's entirely plausible. I'm not going to complain, though, as I thought he was sweet and loved that his focus was getting Bella to feel good about herself again, not helping her to get to a place where they could become a couple.

I do think some of the melodrama with Bella's family was unnecessary on top of all the other stuff going on in the book, which is one of the reason I haven't rated the book as highly as some of the earlier books in the series. Most of the Cannonballers who have read this far in the series seem to suggest that the next book, The Fifteenth Minute, is best avoided. I will heed their wisdom, but will absolutely be checking out other Sarina Bowen books in future.

Crossposted on Cannonball Read. 

#CBR8 Book 9: "The Understatement of the Year" by Sarina Bowen

Page count: 281 pages
Rating: 4 stars

Michael Graham and John Rikker were best friends growing up, spending all their time together, playing hockey either on the ice or on a gaming console in Graham's den. Until the summer when it was quite clear that their friendship was turning into something else and they couldn't keep their hands off each other anymore. Taking every chance they got to be together in secret, their developing relationship came to a violent end when they were caught by a gang of homophobic bullies. Graham managed to run away, Rikker didn't, and ended up in hospital. Then he was shipped off to live with his grandmother and Graham did his best to forget him and the feelings he had, retreating so far into the closet you'd think he'd end up in Narnia.

Five years later, Graham gets a nasty shock when Rikker walks into the locker room after a hockey game, having transferred colleges because he was outed at his previous school and deemed undesirable on the team. Flooded with fear and guilt, Graham knows that Rikker has the power to destroy him with a word. He's terrified that Rikker will admit that they not only knew each other in high school, but used to hook up. It's not the comments, snide remarks and outright slurs Rikker has to face makes it look all that appealing to be openly gay on a college hockey team either, so Graham descends into a shame spiral of denial and repressed lust and tries to bury his true feelings with copious amounts of alcohol. His best friend Bella and occasional fuck buddy, Bella, is worried about him, but doesn't understand why he's careening out of control.

It's quite clear that sooner or later Graham and Rikker are going to have to talk and face the past between them. It's also obvious that both guys still have a lot of complex feelings for the other. Graham isn't ready or interested in coming out as gay and Rikker isn't going to force him, even though he's no longer willing, or able, to live a lie. It's going to be a very tense hockey season for two guys at Harkness College.

I haven't read a whole lot of gay romance, which is probably something I should work on changing, and I have very little experience outside my own hetero normative existence. None of my gay friends or colleagues have ever (as far as I know of, it's not like they tell me everything) had to face serious condemnation, harassment or violence because of their sexual identity. Their families, friends and co-workers have never been anything but supportive of them and while there are narrow-minded and violent bigots everywhere, Norway is a very progressive country with equal rights granted to lesbians and gays in regards to gay marriage, adoption, assisted fertility and the like.

At the same time, I work at a school where many of the teenagers are extremely hostile to the idea of homosexuality and several kids have said they think it should be outlawed or that gay people should be imprisoned or stoned. In the six years I've worked there, I can count on the fingers of one hand the amount of kids who have been confident and strong enough to be out openly at the school, and then usually not until tenth grade, when their peers are getting a bit more mature and ready to graduate. What I'm trying to say with these TL, DR paragraphs is that I have no idea what it's like to be gay, and certainly not to have to hide your sexual preferences, feelings and desires because you might be faced with harassment or violence if you showed your true self.

Hence Michael Graham's struggle and complete denial wasn't always easy to relate to. While Rikker was beaten up and rejected by his bigoted family, he clearly ended up in a much better place than Graham, as his grandmother was a loving and wonderful woman and Vermont was a much more open and accepting place to grow up. He was able to openly live the life he wanted, at least until he applied to play hockey for a religious college and was outed by a malicious ex. The management at the varsity team at Harkness are obviously more open-minded, with the coach and student manager being completely fine with Rikker's identity. Nonetheless, there are a lot of the players who are less than comfortable with the idea that Rikker is gay and keep making snide remarks and getting on his case about it.

Graham escaped the beating, but as a result wasn't forced to come out to his family and friends. He's riddled with guilt for running away, letting the boy he loved be beaten, and never even came to see him in the hospital. His true sexual preferences are tied up with so much guilt, fear and shame, but until Rikker walks back into his life, he's been able to avoid facing up to it, getting by with getting drunk and hooking up with women to hide his true desires. With Rikker there as a constant reminder of his tragic past and his true feelings, Graham gets to a point where he can't bottle it anymore. Once again, he can't keep himself away from Rikker, but he also isn't ready to have anything but a secret relationship. He isn't confident or brave enough to face the unpleasantness that would come with being openly gay and so keeps hurting the man he loves by refusing to be openly seen with him. I found Graham frustrating for a lot of the book, and didn't really like the way he would string Rikker along, but at the same time, I couldn't really blame him for his reluctance to crawl out of the closet, seeing how Rikker was treated by his old team and still faces shit for his choices.

Of all of the Ivy League books, this is the one that actually features a fair amount of hockey being played, what with both Rikker and Graham being key players on the Harkness varsity team. Hartley from The Year We Fell Down is the team captain, and one of the ones who's completely openly supportive of Rikker and furious every time there are slurs written on Rikker's locker or rival players shout insults. I mentioned in a previous review that I couldn't actually care less about the sport aspect of any of these New Adult romances that I'm discovering that I really enjoy. I therefore couldn't tell you if the hockey part is in any way accurate, and wouldn't have minded if there was less of it. Still, it seemed accurate enough, even though I could have lived without the reminder of how awful having a serious concussion is (hoping my head aches will be a thing of the past after the new glasses I get next week).

Once again, this is a pretty angsty romance, with a especially Graham having a lot of issues to work through both by himself and Rikker before they eventually get their happy ending. I enjoyed it, if I couldn't really directly relate to all the things in it, and I thought Graham took way too long to snap out of his self pity and treat his boyfriend right. I also felt sorry that Bella, who was a pretty great character was so hurt by Graham's lies, even if he never meant to be cruel. Her book is up next and I'm looking forward to reading more about her.

Crossposted on Cannonball Read.

#CBR8 Book 8: "Blonde Date" by Sarina Bowen

Page count: 109 pages
Rating: 5 stars

Katie Vickery is a sorority pledge and there is no way she can show up to a party without a date. Having just broken up with her jerky football player boyfriend, she's at a bit of a loss, until her roommate Scarlet sets her up with a childhood friend, Andrew Baschnagel. While Katie normally dates football players, at least Andy is an athlete and an upperclassman, even if the sport is basketball. Of course, Katie pretty much wants to eat worms than go to the party, as her lowlife ex is going to be there, along with his fraternity brothers, in front of whom Katie was humiliated. Yet it's an important night, so Katie's going to suck it up and put on a brave face. She can tell instantly that Andy's a very sweet guy, even though he's way taller than she's used to and she's worried he's going to think she's a complete nutcase.

Pretty much all of Andy's experience with girls comes from his older sisters, one of whom has been advising him over the phone before his big blind date. Having admired Katie from afar since they started taking history together, he can't quite believe his luck when he gets a chance to go out with her, but isn't really thinking that it's going to be more than a one time occurrence. He can tell that she's nervous and upset about something and just hopes it's not because she doesn't want to be seen with a big geek like him. Doing his very best to put her at ease, he's absolutely appalled when she finally confesses why she's so uncomfortable with the idea of seeing her ex-boyfriend again and does his best to help her gain the upper hand and regain her confidence.

After the total angst-fest that was The Year We Hid Away, Blonde Date was like a delightfully refreshing palate cleanser. Having already found out the end point of Andy and Katie's blind date in the previous book, there wasn't much doubt in my mind (even if this wasn't a romance) that things were going to go well for the couple, but it was nonetheless fun to see how they ended up at the point we get an indirect glimpse of towards the end of Scarlet and Bridger's book. Scarlet has two roommates, both named Katie. Initially she doesn't get to know them all that well, because she keeps having to tell them lies about who she is and where she's from, but as the story progresses we get more insight into the Katies, although obviously not as much as we get from this novella.

With alternating chapters showing Katie and Andy's preparations for the date, as well as their actual evening together, it was clear that Katie wasn't the party girl bimbo that she may have appeared initially in The Year We Hid Away. It's also clear that the really awful way she was treated by her ex-boyfriend has made Katie re-assess what she actually wants from her life and I can absolutely see why she's reluctant to paste a pretty smile on her face and pretend nothing is wrong. A lesser woman would probably have broken, but Katie refuses to let her douchy ex get her down for too long. I'm also glad that while it's an embarrassing topic, Katie doesn't wait too long to tell Andy the truth about why she's being so skittish. I also want to reassure readers that while what happened to Katie was humiliating and so above and beyond what is ok to do to a woman, it involves consensual sex and not any rape or sexual assault.

Andy might have been almost too sensitive, understanding and perfect, but as someone who likes my men tall, kind, funny and geeky, I didn't care that he was so flawless he was practically Gary Stu-adjacent. The fact remains, there are nice, inexperienced guys out there who don't assume they're entitled to a woman's affection just because they're not creeps. I thought this novella made some wonderful points about women's agency, the nature of consent, as well pointing out that an actual decent guy doesn't have to promote or constantly mention how "nice" he is. It doesn't hurt that the game Andy proposes he and Katie play to put her more at ease during what could be the most awkward party of her life made me laugh out loud several times. After the darkness and pain of the previous book, I needed some lightness and fun. I see why Mrs. Julien has declared this story an instant classic.

Crossposted on Cannonball Read.

#CBR8 Book 7: "The Year We Hid Away" by Sarina Bowen

Page count: 274 pages
Rating: 5 stars

Having spent the previous year pretty much focused on hockey and dating as many different women as possible, Bridger Macaulley's life drastically changes when he realises that his dead-beat mother isn't just doing drugs anymore, but that she's now part of a gang that actually cooks meths at home. He takes his seven-year-old little sister Lucy out of there and hides her in his dorm room, while spending every available moment while she's at school taking a double course load so he can graduate faster or working a part-time job to make money so they can afford somewhere to stay outside of term. He knows he has friends who would drop everything to help him, but as he's breaking several college rules, he doesn't want to involve anyone else in his illegal activities or forcing his burden onto someone else. Every spare minute he has when Lucy isn't in school is spent taking care of her. He certainly doesn't have time to date, but when he meets the intriguing Scarlet, he just can't seem to keep away from her.

Scarlet is keeping secrets of her own. She legally changed her name the summer before she went to Harkness college and had to sneak past news vans camped out outside her home to get away to school. With her high profile hockey-coach and philanthropist father accused of some truly horrible and unfathomable crimes, Scarlet sees no other option but to lie through her teeth about who she really is and who her family are. Having suffered a whole year as a pariah in her final year of high school due to the accusations against her dad, she just wants to create a new life for herself, away from the demands of her parents, her father's bodyguards and lawyers, the prosecution and the press. Accepted to Harkness on a hockey scholarship, Scarlet doesn't feel she can play the sport she so loves, in case someone connects her skill to the life she's trying to escape. She hates that she has to lie to her roommates, her new friends and especially the gorgeous Bridger, who she shares two classes with each day, but she also knows that if the truth comes out, she'll be as ostracised at Harkness as she was in high school.

Two people with burdens far heavier than anyone starting out in life should be expected to carry, trying so hard to get through the days through a filter of lies, and finding solace in the company of each other. Neither Bridger nor Scarlet are looking for love, but they grow ever closer and find that the suck that is their life gets a little bit easier to bear when they are close to the other. Bridger has very little free time to spend outside classes or work, but the lectures he spends in the company of Scarlet and the lunches they're able to have together gives him something to focus on other than the constant fear that someone will discover the truth about his family situation and either force him to return his sister to his unfit mother or worse, have her placed in foster care. Scarlet tries desperately not to think too much about her father's case and whether or not the accusations against him are actually true. Her parents and her father's unscrupulous bodyguard want her to return home to speak to her father's lawyers, while warning her away from the DA's people. Scarlet doesn't want to even think about the case and can't see what she could probably say that could help the defence or the prosecution either way. She hates that she has to lie to everyone, but especially Bridger.

There is so much pain and angst in this book and some ridiculously dramatic things happening to these young people, and yet Bowen makes it not only believable, but completely engrossing. Bridger may be the NA equivalent of a reformed rake, he used to be all about the partying and ladies, whilst now he's all about taking care of his family and doing his best to secure his and his little sister's future. Scarlet is a victim of circumstances so horrible I actually cringed while reading. I can't imagine having to be in her position and was amazed at how well she actually dealt with circumstances. I felt such strong empathy for both characters and could barely put the book down.

Neither protagonist is free to speak openly and honestly to the other, which leads to some complications and occasionally unnecessary drama and there were occurrences of some of my least favourite plot hurdles - the "I must drive away the person I love most in the world because I will make their life worse/they're unsafe with me/better off without me", but luckily none of that got too excessive and was resolved relatively quickly, allowing me to still love the book. Some of the ways in which Bridger's and Scarlet's troubles were resolved towards the end of the book were possibly a bit too convenient and neat, but romances are all about getting to the happy ending, so I'll allow it.

The Year We Fell Down was a really good book. The Year We Hid Away was even better, even though the amount of pain and angst at certain parts of the story just made me want to curl up and cringe. I'm so glad I finally got round to reading these. Thanks again to Mrs. Julien for sending me the Amazon gift card that enabled me to buy it.

Crossposted on Cannonball Read.

#CBR8 Book 6: "The Year We Fell Down" by Sarina Bowen

Page count: 270 pages
Rating: 4.5 stars

Corey Callahan was expecting to go to prestigious Harkness College as a varsity hockey player, but instead arrives there in a wheelchair, after ending up partly paralysed from the wait down after an accident on the ice. Her cheerful new roommate doesn't seem to mind that they have to stay in a handicap-accessible room away from all the other Harkness freshmen. If having to re-assess all her hopes and dreams about college wasn't difficult enough, Corey also falls head over heels for the extremely hot hockey player in the room across the hall, incapacitated by a leg broken in two places. The only problem? Adam Hartley already has a girlfriend.

Hartley's girlfriend is spending a semester abroad, however, and as they are both stuck in the "gimp ghetto" together, Hartley and Corey strike up a close friendship, taking lectures together, helping each other manoeuvre the dining hall and bonding over hockey played on a games console, since neither of them can skate on the ice at the moment. Corey grows more miserable as with time, she discovers that Hartley isn't just drop dead gorgeous, but smart, charming, friendly and funny. While all his friends and teammates seem to be encouraging him to forget his bitchy girlfriend, Hartley is determined to stay faithful to her. Will Corey ever have a chance with him? Will a vibrant and clearly active guy like Hartley ever see a broken girl like Corey as anything more than "one of the guys"?

Last year, a number of Cannonballers read and rated Sarina Bowen's The Ivy Years books, a series of New Adult novels set at the fictional Harkness College, mostly centred around hockey, very highly. Hence when the first book in the series was available for free on Amazon for a limited time, I jumped at the chance to get it. To complete the last few of my massive amount of reading challenges towards the end of 2015, I never got round to actually starting the series, but now, with a new reading year open to me and less demanding reading challenges on my plate, I figured I'd see what all the fuss was about. Like with Kristen Callihan's Game On books, featuring American football players, I know little to nothing about the sport that many of the characters care about and couldn't really care less about it either. Unlike with American football, however, I teach at a school where quite a lot of the
teenagers play hockey and I've actually seen the game being played.

Not that there's much hockey being actually played in this book, unless you count the computer game kind. Yet it plays an integral part in the lives of both protagonists. Corey's older brother is a former student at Harkness and used to play for the college hockey team. Hartley and his teammates all know him and are amused to discover that Corey is his little sister. Because she gets the game and all their references, it doesn't take long before they've all adopted her, while trying not to talk too much about the fact that Corey won't ever again be able to play the game they all love so much. While Corey has insecurities of her looks and especially the fact that she's stuck in a wheelchair, she's determined not to let her injury define her and there certainly isn't a "poor little me" attitude about her. She works hard to work up her strength so she can get around on crutches instead of solely in the wheelchair and she has an amazing gallows humour, often making jokes at her own expense before anyone else can. The fact that Hartley is stuck in the same boat as her, confined to crutches for a whole semester, makes it less lonely for her to be a "gimp".

Hartley is an all-round pretty great guy, but can't get over that he is illegitimate and comes from a poor background. While none of his friends can really stand his snooty, privileged and wealthy girlfriend, Stacia, Hartley is amazed that someone so popular and high class would even deign to look in his direction, and puts up with way more than is entirely reasonable just to be with her. While he and Corey start out as friends, it's obvious as time passes that there is more between them than just camaraderie, and once he becomes aware of the feelings Corey has for him, he should either have broken up with Stacia or stopped being quite so flirty with Corey, as leading her on was just needlessly cruel. I also didn't like the way he handled being stood up on his birthday, as he'd previously been so firm about being faithful and not fooling around. Once again, it was cruel towards Corey. Hartley spending way too long coming to his senses and refusing to dump Stacia, even when he knew full well that Corey was into him, is the reason I'm deducting half a star from the rating of the book.

As well as a great, gradually developing from friendship to love relationship between the protagonists, I really liked the presence of several of the supporting characters. The friendship between Corey and her roommate Dana is a great one and Hartley's teammates were also fun when they appeared. I liked the way the girls supported each other and how Dana forced Corey out of her comfort zone occasionally, preventing her from just holing up in their room all the time, away from the world. I can absolutely see why Sarina Bowen's books were popular among so many and am glad I finally got to jump on the band wagon too.

Crossposted on Cannonball Read.