CBR17 Book 28: "The Love Haters" by Katherine Center

Page count: 320 pages

Rating: 2 stars

Thank you to St. Martin's Press and Netgalley for this ARC. My opinions are my own.

Katie Vaughn is worried about being fired, so she lies about being able to swim, and is persuaded to go to Key West to film a recruitment video about the coast guard. There she meets Tom "Hutch" Hucheson, the seemingly perfect older brother of her co-worker Cole, who has not been informed that his brother has weaselled out of filming the video. Katie is also pretty much adopted by Hutch's "Aunt" Rue and her vibrant and colourful gang of pensioners who hang out in the apartment complex that Rue owns and manages. 

Katie is a "love hater" because her boyfriend cheated on her and broke up with her right as his career as a musician took off, so she's pretty much done with men. Now her ex's songs are playing on the radio constantly, and his most recent hit is literally called "Katie" and seems to be all about how he messed up and wants her back. Katie also has self esteem, a very complicated relationship with food and because of fat shaming by her stepmother early in life, she pretty much hates her body. She literally has a near-panic attack when she has to put on a swimsuit. 

Hutch isn't really a love hater, it's just that his brother Cole doesn't really know his brother at all, he just seems to be jealous that his brother is easy-going, kind, very handsome, has a very impressive job (and became virally famous briefly for saving Jenifer Aniston's dog). So anything he says is likely to be untrue. Hutch agreed to have his work featured, because the coast guard really does need new recruits, but he wanted his brother to do it, so they could spend more time together, and more importantly, with Rue. Nevertheless, he adapts without too much complaint and also agrees to give Katie swim lessons.

Obviously they catch feelings over the course of the book, but now, about a month after I finished the book, I can't actually remember what it is that complicates matters and makes it so that they can't be together. I'm guessing it's probably that Hutch lives and works in Florida and Katie is from somewhere else (again, no memory of where)? The first half of the book is slow, and while I can sympatise with a heroine with some quirks, some of Katie's issues are clearly serious enough that she should have been (and probably still be) in intensive therapy, rather than just have her supportive bestie try to talk her down whenever she has a wobbly. When they dominate the story quite that much, it would be nice if there was some sort of resolution over the course of the story. But there isn't. Although she learns to appreciate colourful clothing and doesn't freak out when she has to wear a bathing suit, so that's good enough, right?

The second half of the book, especially the last third, is when I seriously considered just giving up. If I had a physical copy of the book, I would have been tempted to throw it at a wall. Cole suddenly shows up out of nowhere and pretends that he and Katie are dating. Their boss, who is bitter after an acrimonious divorce, also shows up, and the fake relationship has to happen or Katie and/or Cole might get fired? I think Cole is meant to be charming, I found him to be human garbage. There's also a whole thing about a hurricane and needing to evacuate and Katie making incredibly stupid choices.However, I persevered, hoping that maybe the story could be saved - alas, it was not to be. 

I've only read one book by Katherine Center previously, The Rom-Commers, which I liked enough to rate it 4.5 stars, despite a rather shaky final act there too. This, I can only give 2.5 to, and that's mainly for aunt Rue and her Golden Girls-esque group of friends, and the fact that being a coast guard is a more unsusual profession to give your hero. If this had been my first attempt at Ms. Center's writing, I would not read any more of her books, despite owning several of them as e-books. I did really like The Rom-Commers, though, so I will give her at least one more chance. 

Judging a book by its cover: I have no idea what's going on with this cover, but it doesn't in any way fit with the contents of this book. This makes it seem like it's about people lazing about and enjoying themselves on vacation, which isn't the case at all. Katie gets an anxiety attack just having to put on a bathing suit, there is no way she'd ever display herself so openly on a pool floatie. Hutch is a professional rescue swimmer who doesn't seem to have time for this sort of leisurely relaxation. 

Crossposted on Cannonball Read. 

CBR16 Book 11: "Canadian Boyfriend" by Jenny Holiday

Page count: 384 pages

Audio book length: 10 hrs 52 mins

Rating: 4 stars

This was an audio ARC from Netgalley. My opinions are my own.

CBR16 Sweet Books: Exciting (I've been looking forward to this for a long time, and was VERY excited to get an ARC shortly before the release date. 

Nowhere Bingo: A book with multiple POVs

When Aurora "Rory" Evans was a lonely teenager, she ran into a handsome Canadian hockey player while she was selling coffee at the Mall of America. She took his name and pretended to have an actual Canadian boyfriend, making her loneliness and ostracism seem more bearable, because even if she had been invited to things, she wouldn't have been able to come, since she was probably visiting her boyfriend, in Canada. And obviously, he couldn't come to school dances or her ballet recitals, living in Canada and all. To keep up the ruse, she also wrote her fictional boyfriend long letters, basically making them a sort of journal for some difficult years in her life.

Now an adult, having given up on ballet as it was making her sick, Aurora works as a dance teacher in a small town. She still struggles with her years of disordered eating, and occasionally gets panic attacks, but she's doing a lot better and enjoys teaching children the joys of dance. To her great surprise, the tragically widowed Mike Martin, whose daughter comes back to dance classes after some time away (what with the grief and the dead mum and soforth), is none other than the handsome young man she took as inspiration for her fake boyfriend. To her credit, it takes her a while to confirm to herself that the Mike she met as a teenager and this Mike are the same person, but even when she does, she doesn't tell him the truth about her teenage coping mechanism. 

Mike loved his wife and is still dealing with a lot of emotions after her sudden death in a car accident. Olivia, Rory's dance student, is his step-daughter and while he's the only father she's ever known, he's had to fight his parents-in-law for custody, which hasn't exactly made the grieving process easier. It's clear that Olivia adores her father, but she's also a tween who lost her mother and is prone to tantrums and sudden outbursts. Dance classes with "Miss Rory" are one of her favourite things. Mike likes that Aurora doesn't fawn over him (unlike many of the dance mums) and he sees the easy rapport she has with Olivia, and when he discovers that Aurora is working multiple jobs to make ends meet, offers to hire her to be Olivia's sort-of nanny while he's off resuming his hockey career. 

So the romance here takes a while to develop. Aurora is keeping the secret that she basically used Mike as a template for a fantasy boyfriend for a long time as a teenager, a truth that becomes more difficult to tell the longer she knows him and the closer they become. Mike is also Aurora's employer (she refuses to take a paycheck, but lives in his basement, has access to a car whenever she needs it, and gets health insurance) for a lot of the book, which certainly complicates the situation between them somewhat. Mike also feels like he can't date again until his daughter is older, possibly even until after she's old enough to move out. He doesn't feel like he can introduce a new woman into her life, in case they break up and she would have to deal with losing another person. When they do finally decide to become more than friends, they do address the employer/employee complication, so it's very much not a case of anyone being exploited or taken advantage of. 

There's so much to like in this book. The close friendship between Aurora and her best friend (who owns the dance studio where she works). Mike has been in therapy since his wife died, and once Aurora gets health insurance, she can also afford to see a therapist. She has a long list of reasons as to why she needs to, beginning with the relationship with her very controlling mother, who still makes her feel guilty for giving up a career as a dancer, because of all the time and money her mother put into "supporting" her daughter. There's the disordered eating, which still creates problems for her occasionally, although I liked how she tried to get more comfortable with allowing herself sugary things and her anxiety. And after a while, it's actually her complicated feelings about her relationship with Mike. 

By the way, notice how I keep calling the male protagonist simply Mike in my review? My major complaint about this book, the main reason I cannot give it five stars, even though I really enjoyed it and it did so many things well, is that consistently, throughout the entire book, up to and including the epilogue, Aurora calls Mike by his full name. He is Mike Martin EVERY single time she refers to him. I get it when they are still just acquaintances, and he's the father of one of the girls she teaches. But once she moves into his house to take care of his daughter? Once they actually start engaging in spicy recreational activities? Why? Who does that? 

I do not call or think of my husband as Mark Patterson, he's just Mark. Possible exception if I have to fill out official paperwork or something, then I guess I'd use his full name. Why, Aurora? What is your deal? What is up with that? This strange quirk started bothering me about halfway through the book when I really started noticing it, and by the end of the book, I was annoyed enough that it made me want to scream. So no five stars for you, book. 

It's been a while since I listened to an audio book with two narrators, but to me, this had an unusual audio format. I'm used to romance novels that have alternating POVs between the protagonists, and if the audiobook has two different narrators, they read the entire chapter from "their" character's POV. That is not the case here. Emily Ellet narrates the chapters where Aurora is the POV character and Joshua Jackson narrates Mike's. In all the chapters, Ellet does all the female voices and Jackson does all the male voices. So it becomes a sort of hybrid between a standard audio book and an audio drama. I really liked it. I've now come across another romance audio that did the same thing. If this is a new trend in dual-POV books in audio, whether romance or not, I'm a big fan. It makes the whole thing a lot more entertaining. 

Both narrators for this are really good and make the story more engaging. Normally, I only listen to audiobooks when I'm going to and from work, or am out doing errands, or if I'm doing chores. Now, I kept finding excuses to listen more. I know there was a lot of excitement on social media because THE  Joshua Jackson (of Dawson's Creek and Fringe fame) was doing the male part. Is this actually his first time doing audiobooks? If so, he did a good job. I enjoyed the audiobook enough that I used one of my precious Audible credits on it once I finished listening. So even if this was an ARC originally, Ms. Holiday got another sale.

Niggles about Aurora's weird name quirk aside, this was really good and I liked how Mike's character actually got the space and time to work through his many issues because of his wife's death. Neither Aurora nor Mike are magically healed by the love of another, and keep going to therapy because even once they work through the final act complications, both of them need mental health support. In so many books, one or both of the main characters should have intense and comprehensive therapy to deal with their MANY issues - that is not the case here.

I think the next book in the series is about Gretchen, Aurora's best friend. I can't wait. Hopefully, she'll not refer to her romantic partner with first and surname constantly. 

Judging a book by its cover: By now, I can pretty much recognise a Leni Kaufmann-illustrated cover at a glance. I always love her covers, and this one is particularly cute. Not entirely sure why the guy (clearly Mike) looks like the twin of Andy Dwyer from Parks and Recreation, but the pink and the mint-green and Aurora's lovely ballet slippers - the playful way she sits and glances over at Mike. It works for me on every level. 

Crossposted on Cannonball Read.

CBR15 Book 103: "Heartstopper, vol 5" by Alice Oseman

Page count: 336 pages

Rating: 4 stars

Nick and Charlie are closer than ever, but despite what their friends think, they still haven't done THAT. Lately, it's probably all either can think about, but it's a big step and neither wants to pressure the other.

Nick is also a year older than Charlie, and is having to consider which Universities he's going to apply to next year. His first inclination is living at home and going to his local Uni, so he'll be close to Charlie, but he goes on a road trip with Elle and Tara, and discovers that there are very appealing places elsewhere in the country too. Elle finds her dream University, and it will mean a long distance relationship with Tao. Can Nick and Charlie manage the same?

Mr. Farouk is encouraging Charlie to apply for Head Boy in his final year, saying that a lot of students at the school could use a role model like him. He also wants to have the occasional sleepover at Nick's, but his mother is feeling overprotective and her reluctance causes tension between them. In the end, she agrees that he can stay over at Nick's once he's done with exams.

Charlie, not exactly the most extroverted or confident, thanks to all the bullying, also agrees to play drums for a queer band during the end-of-year summer féte. It's a much more public role than he's ever been in before, and he's both nervous and excited about the opportunity.

I hadn't realised that there was going to be a volume of Heartstopper out this year, so finding out that this was coming out in December was a pleasant surprise (even more that I found the book at half price at a shop in the UK while visiting my parents-in-law for Christmas). As it turns out, I had already read a lot of the issues collected in this book online on Tapas. The only reason I hadn't read all of them is that I took a break so more issues of the webcomic could be collected (one issue a week is too short). Oseman has announced that volume 6 will be the final one, and I'm now thinking that I may just stop reading the webcomic, so as not to be spoiled for the ending. 

I love this comic. It's so heartwarming and cute and the issues in this book are very low angst, even with questions of long-distance relationships being discussed. Nick and Charlie and their friends are such great characters and I'm glad queer youth have some nice examples of LGBTQIA fiction to comfort them. 

Judging a book by its cover: All the other covers have shown Nick and Charlie from the back, getting a bit closer with each volume. This is the first one where they are actually fully embracing, and I think the image is adorable. 

Crossposted on Cannonball Read

CBR15 Book 23: "Three Little Words" by Jenny Holiday

Page count: 369 pages

Rating: 3.5 stars

CBR15 Bingo: Bodies Bodies (self-esteem issues, eating disorder)

15-word review: International supermodel Gia has an eating disorder, but eats when restaurant owner Bennet feeds her. 

Longer review: Gia Gallo is used to travelling in her job as a globe-trotting fashion model. Recently, she struggles with the fact that she doesn't fit into the teeny tiny sizes of the clothes she's supposed to model, and she's not really sure if she's not outgrown the whole industry, both in body size and motivation-wise. Having never been in anything outside of the fashion world, however, she doesn't really feel like she would be qualified for anything else if she were to retire. The pressures of her job are causing her to have massively disordered eating. Deep down she knows it's a problem, but she doesn't really want to own up to it, and she's certainly not ready for anyone else to find out, especially not her best friends.

One of those best friends, Wendy, is getting married in Florida in six days. Gia has Wendy's late mother's wedding dress and needs to get to Florida in time to have the dress altered before the ceremony. Unfortunately, she's stuck in New York in a snowstorm, and no matter how much she threatens or pleads with airline staff, is she getting out of there by air. It just so happens that the best man for the wedding, restaurant owner and chef Bennett Buchanan is also stuck in the city, with the wedding rings, and he gets the last rental car but offers to let her come along for the road trip if she dials down her fashion diva behaviour. 

Because the weather is decidedly not on their side, Bennett and Gia decide to drive all the way to Florida. They fight their obvious attraction for one another, because Gia is only interested in a short-term fling, while Bennett only doesn't do casual hook-ups. Their differing outlook on relationships doesn't keep them from jumping one another for too long, though. As their road trip progresses and they get to know each other better, it also becomes very obvious to Bennet that Gia has an eating disorder, but she never seems to refuse food as long as he's the one cooking it for her. He tries to encourage her to open up to her friends about her troubles, while she helps him get more comfortable with his past and his relationship with his family. 

This is the third and final of the Bridesmaids Behaving Badly series, and by the end of it, all three friends introduced over the course of the series end up married. I enjoy Holiday's books, although none of them have impressed me enough to rate five stars yet. She's not on the 'buy at full price', and certainly not on the extremely rare 'buy in pre-order as soon as it becomes available' list, but I will keep picking up her book on sale.

Judging a book by its cover: This cover is perfectly fine, but since Gia has her hair dyed for the majority of the book, I really think the cover model's hair should have reflected that. I'm sure it's possible to do that sort of thing in editing after the photo is taken, so the model wouldn't even have had to dye her hair for real. 

CBR14 Book 6: "The Worst Guy" by Kate Canterbary

Page count: 340 pages

Rating: 4.5 stars

Sebastian Stremmel is a trauma surgeon at a large Boston hospital, rumoured to be the chief of staff's pick for the next chief of surgery. He's also known to be grumpy, rather antisocial, and a workaholic. Sara Shapiro is an introverted plastic surgeon working at the same hospital who forces herself to be cheerful and friendly in public to hide her own social anxiety and unease around others. Sebastian finds Sara annoyingly chirpy, she finds him unbelievably rude and arrogant. They try to avoid one another as much as possible, despite living in the same apartment building along with other surgeons from the hospital. 

After Sara furiously confronts Sebastian about the treatment of a patient of hers, a series of unlikely events lead to a wrecked exam room in the ER. The two doctors find themselves forced to do eight weeks of mandatory conflict resolution counseling, which not only involves weekly meetings with a therapist but a lot of homework where they have to spend time together outside of work. It doesn't take long before their extreme antagonism causes a reaction and they find themselves tearing each other's clothes off after every mandatory counseling session. Initially, they keep studiously avoiding one another outside the therapy sessions, assigned "homework" interactions, or their hate f*cking sessions. As the weeks proceed, however, they slowly begin to share more personal stuff and their feelings begin to change.

As far as I could tell, several of the supporting characters in this book have featured in other Canterbary novels in the past. I'm assuming Sebastian and possibly also Sara may have appeared previously in a supporting capacity, but I didn't feel like I was missing out on any significant backstory by beginning with this book.

Both Sebastian and Sara have significant emotional baggage which makes it difficult for them to open up to others and neither are exactly wildly sociable. Sebastian is part of an established friend group of doctors, who keep wanting to include Sara as well. While he's frequently surly and stand-offish and very much a workaholic, his friends clearly accept him, flaws and all, and he doesn't seem to mind the gentle ribbing he gets from them. Sara projects a pleasant and outgoing facade in public because she has learned to be a people pleaser, but in private she's nothing like her chirpy work persona and keeps to herself. She tries to avoid social situations because anything involving food and/or drink will likely become deeply awkward since she has extremely strict dietary needs since she's recovering from a serious eating disorder and her body cannot handle a lot of foods and certainly not alcohol without her getting violently ill.

One of the things about her that drive Sebastian up the wall is the small bags of snacks she keeps carrying everywhere and insists on grazing from. Yet even before he discovers the true reason for her odd snacking habits, his need to nurture and care for others manifests itself, and he begins silently picking out and removing the parts of the trail mix she never eats so she won't have to worry about them. There are a lot of such show, don't tell moments throughout the story, where Canterbary show the readers who her protagonists really are, and why they'd be so perfect for one another. 

With my reading slump this year, just finding a book that so fully holds my attention that I finish it in less than a weekend is a great feeling, and while I wanted to give this book a full five stars (I might, upon a reread), I did think there were a bit too many angsty moments of "oh, I'm not good enough for him/her" in the latter half of the book before I got to the satisfying happy ending. Still, I will absolutely be seeking out more of Canterbary's novels, to see if any of her many other books are as entertaining and satisfying as this one. 

Judging a book by its cover: You don't often see bearded heroes on the covers of romance novels, at least not if the character in question isn't a biker or lumberjack or some such. As our protagonist in question is a surgeon at the top of his field, one might wonder if the beard is even something someone whose job it is to perform surgery should have, what with the associated hygiene risks. Having looked it up, it seems it is OK for surgeons to have facial hair, but they have to wear additional protective gear to ensure the patients' safety. 

Crossposted on Cannonball Read. 

#CBR13 Book 38: "Heartstopper, vol 4" by Alice Oseman

Page count: 353 pages

Rating: 4 stars

CBR13 Bingo: Reader's Choice (replaces Landscape)

Charlie and Nick are getting crazier and crazier about each other, they still haven't actually declared their feelings fully for one another. That's one hurdle that can be monumental in any relationship, let alone between already insecure teens. While Nick's Mum is incredibly supportive, he still hasn't come out to his Dad, who is going to be visiting soon, and based on his brother, he's not sure how his father is going to react. 

Then there's the rather more worrying realisation that Nick has come to - he's pretty sure that Nick is suffering from disordered eating to a degree where he won't be able to handle it by himself. Their relationship is still new and fresh enough that that's not a conversation that's fun to have. 

While Heartstopper volumes 1-3 are mostly incredibly comforting and uplifting reading, Oseman doesn't shy away from more serious topics, and by now, in volume 4, she's fully established the various romantic and more platonic relationships and can delve into some darker territory. Coming out to a distant parent and having to deal with an eating disorder definitely qualify as darker. Not that I needed to worry, the topics are covered with the same deft touch and sensitivity that Oseman showed in her first three volumes. I continue to love this graphic novel series, and will be buying new volumes as long as Oseman chooses to write them. 

As well as the continuing romantic adventures and struggles of Nick and Charlie, the comic is full of their friends and family members, as established in the first three books. At the end of this volume, there is also a little bonus comic showing glimpses of the romance of the two male teachers who found each other on the Paris trip in volume 3. 

Judging a book by its cover: It shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone that this is a romance comic, based on the image on the cover. For unwary readers, the LGBTQ+ topic may be surprising, but I doubt many people start with volume 4 of something and are therefore very aware of what they're getting.

Crossposted by Cannonball Read. 

#CBR12 Book 95: "Just Listen" by Sarah Dessen

Page count: 396 pages

Audio book length: 11 hrs 46 mins

Rating: 4 stars

While Annabel Greene may star in the local department store's back to school commercial as "The girl who has everything", she returns to school utterly ostracised, after a summer spent alone, after a disastrous party late last term where everything changed for her.

When she runs into her former best friend Sophie, undisputed Queen Bee at their school, she is met with insults and sharp comments. When she thinks back to that one night when Sophie turned against her, she throws up. The only one she sees regularly now, not that they ever speak, is the mysterious Owen Armstrong, rumoured to have a serious temper, enough to have sent him on a stint to juvie.

Despite the fact that Annabel has gone from being one of the most popular girls in school to an utter outcast, she doesn't share any of this with her family. Nor does say anything to her mother about wanting to quit modelling, even though Annabel hasn't really enjoyed doing it for ages now. Annabel is the youngest of three, with both of her older sisters having very strong personalities. Annabel became the peacekeeper, the one who tells white lies and omits to share her own discomfort just so others won't ever feel hurt or uncomfortable. Her mother struggled with depression for a while, and Annabel is terrified that now that her sisters have both quit modelling, her mother will descend back into depression if Annabel too announces that she doesn't want to do it anymore. 

Annabel's eldest sister Kirsten is a waitress/hostess in New York and studies communication part-time. She briefly shared a flat with their middle sister, Whitney, who had a very successful run modelling in the Big Apple and developed an eating disorder that left her unconscious on the bathroom floor, her emaciated body having gone into shut down. Annabel was the one who found her. Now, months later, Whitney lives at home, carefully supervised by her parents and forced into a healthy eating regime and therapy she bristles against. Even if Annabel felt that she could talk about the things that have happened to her, she doesn't really have anyone to open up to.

Eventually, Owen and Annabell start chatting during their shared lunches, and Annabell is shocked to discover that Owen never lies and strives to be honest in all things. He's been through a lot of anger management and has learned to sift through the sort of polite deflections most people offer when they don't want to be put on the spot. Through her friendship with Owen, Annabel is forced to re-evaluate her own approach to life and especially truth-telling, and she keeps having her eyes opened to new experiences thanks to Owen's truly eclectic tastes in music. Being as open and honest as Owen is utterly terrifying, however, and Annabel is already shunned and reviled by pretty much everyone. How much worse would it be if people knew what actually happened at that party back in the spring?

Sarah Dessen was never part of my adolescent reading, mainly because she published her first novel in 1996, when I was in my first year of high school, but based on this book, and The Truth About Forever (both published after I had graduated with an M.A from the University of St. Andrews and was busy trying to support myself through call centre work upon my return to Norway), which I read back in 2018, I sort of wish they had been. It's clear why she is such a popular and well-loved writer, and her books feature interesting protagonists in serious and believable situations, who really need to work through issues, yet the books never feel patronising or sanctimonious, or the plots clichéd and predictable. Was it pretty obvious to the reader within a few chapters more or less what had happened at that party that drove a wedge between Annabel and Sophie? Yes, it was, but that's not what the story is really about, so it doesn't matter whether the reader is just waiting for much of the book to have it confirmed.

I suspect reading these books as a teenager is very different from reading them as a middle-aged teacher of secondary school kids. Yet I'm pretty sure that most discerning readers, no matter their age, will be aware that Sophie is an awful, toxic person and that while Annabel is miserable and very lonely at the start of the book, she is much better off without her former "friend".  As someone who has spent much of the last few years learning to be more open, honest, and assertive, I also had great sympathy for Annabel's conflict aversion and always trying to please people. It's still incredibly hard for me to ask for help or be honest about my feelings in situations where I'm uncomfortable, especially if I'm worried about hurting someone's feelings, or that they'll get angry and upset. Like Annabel, I tend to put everyone's needs before my own, and it takes time to reprogram that. 

Both of my Sarah Dessen books have been on my actual (digital) bookshelf since mid-2015, and on my TBR for much longer. I really need to explore more of her books now, but at least one benefit of discovering her this late is that there's a big back catalogue I can explore. 

Judging a book by its cover: Since this book was first published in 2006, this book has had a number of covers, some much more appealing than others. The cover my version has is clearly very geared towards teenage girls, with the pastel pink font with the author's name, as well as the sheet on the girl's bed. A girl intently listening to music is a very suitable choice of cover image, though, as Annabel really starts getting into music through her friendship with Owen. 

Crossposted on Cannonball Read.